Article by John Derbyshire

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National Review Online
July-August, 2001
China Diary, Part 2

[Note:  These diaries are made up of notes I jotted while travelling in China during the summer of 2001 with my wife Rosie (who is Chinese) and our two small children.  They appeared on NRO only in part.  Here I have included the full diaries.] 


Baihe, Eastern Manchuria; July 14th
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I am not much of a sightseer.  Put me in front of one of Nature's wonders in company with a rabble of fellow-tourists all shoving and chattering and posing and fiddling with their damn cameras, and the words of the old hymn float into my mind: 

"Where ev'ry prospect pleases,

And only Man is vile..." 

Being among tourists reminds me of all those other mass activities — sport spectatoring, political conventioneering, demonstrations, revolutions — that bring out the worst in humanity.  No, I am not much of a sightseer.  I have to admit, though, that Heaven Pool got my attention, even to the degree that for a while I forgot the milling, yapping, clicking mob of Chinese and South Korean tourists I saw it with.

Heaven Pool (Tian Chi in Chinese) is an alpine lake, filling the crater of a huge extinct volcano on China's border with North Korea.  It is practically the only sight worth seeing in my wife's home province, but in my opinion it is the equal of an average ten others.  We went up there early on a bright morning in mid-July, taking an overnight train from Changchun, the provincial capital, to a pleasant little town named Baihe (pronounced "by-huh").  One of Rosie's numerous uncles had an old friend in Baihe, and this person very kindly gave up his Saturday to chauffeur us to Heaven Pool and back.  The road now goes right up to the rim of the crater (the usually dependable Lonely Planet guide to China is behind the times on this), way above the tree line, and from the parking lot it is a mere two-minute steep climb to one of the high points on the rim.  As you near the top, the lake comes into view far below:  serene, vast, and completely unspoiled.  All around are fantastic rock formations — most sensationally, great sheets and protuberances of yellowish stone with black rocks imbedded in them, like raisins in a bun. 

I dearly wanted to go down to the lake shore, but the crater walls are so steep this cannot be done from any accessible point on the rim without special gear.  From down below lake level there is a way, but it is closed.  The lake overflows at just one point, over a spectacular waterfall, the beginning of the mighty Songhua River.  From the base of this waterfall a stepped path has been made to take you up the side of the fall and through the gap into the crater, to the lake shore.  However, this path was partly swept away by a rock slide two years ago, and has not been rebuilt.

We satisfied ourselves with strolling — mostly clambering, actually — along the crater rim for different views of the lake below.  Eventually we came to a faded, weather-beaten sign that declared itself as marking the border with North Korea.  You need to be careful here:  the southeastern half of Heaven Pool and its mountain (which, by the way, is named Chang Bai Shan — "Ever-White Mountain") belongs to North Korea.  In 1998 a British hiker attempting to circumambulate the lake was picked up by border guards and spent a month in a North Korean jail — not, I imagine, the part of one's vacation most likely to be recalled with warm nostalgia in years to come.  We saw no border guards, however, so, feeling reckless, we passed beyond the sign and climbed an inviting crag on the North Korean side, chuckling to ourselves that we had succeeded in penetrating into Kim Jong Il's Hermit Kingdom.

Our chauffeur, like all the people in these border regions, knows all about North Korea's problems.  "They have trouble holding on to border guards in these remote areas," he said.  "First chance they get, they defect to China."  North Koreans are now coming into China from their disintegrating homeland in considerable numbers all along the border, in spite of formidable terrain and ferocious penalties if caught, and in spite of an agreement between the two countries this past May declaring that refugees were "breaking international law" and would be subject to repatriation.  Unofficial estimates — there are no official ones, since both China and North Korea deny that the issue exists — put the number of refugees currently in China at 200,000.  One difficulty is that the border regions on the Chinese side are already heavily Korean:  Koreans are one of the fifty-odd "national minorities" the Chinese government makes so much of, along with Tibetans, Uighurs, Mongolians and so on.  A North Korean refugee reaching one of their villages is likely to find a sympathetic reception, and may actually encounter blood relatives.  You hear about these things all over eastern Manchuria, and even in Changchun the people know all about it.  North Korean refugees are a by-word for poverty, destitution and ignorance, dressed as they are in thin rags, gawping as they apparently do at such forgotten wonders as bean-curd and fresh fruit.

The chauffeur, when we asked him what he actually did for a living, told us he was a policeman.  What on earth is there for a policeman to do, I asked him, in a sleepy Manchurian town deep-frozen for six months of the year?  Not much, he allowed:  some petty crime, hu-kou issues.  (The hu-kou is a Chinese person's residence permit, specifying where he may live.  To move from one place to another involves endless bickering with the authorities over the transfer of your hu-kou.)  However, he proved as adept at exploiting his status as are small-town policemen everywhere else in the world.  Taking us around various establishments in the town while we waited for the late-evening train back to Changchun, none of them asked him to pay for the food, drink, ice creams or facilities we consumed.  He told us if we cared to stay overnight in Baihe, he could get us a nice hotel room for free.

Heaven Pool is, for my money — the entire return trip from Changchun cost less than US$200 for the four of us, though admittedly we ate mostly for free on droit de gendarme — one of the natural wonders of the world.  I was sorry not to be able to get to the lakeside and put a hand into that clear unspoiled water, but glad none of the other tourists could do so, either, to foul it with their disgusting touristy garbage and litter.  The place will shimmer away in my imagination as long as I live, circled by its crater walls up there on that cruel border, its icy waters tranquil and unbroken under a July sun.  However, we heard from someone in the town that a Chinese man from Dalian plans to swim the width of Heaven Pool next month, if negotiations with the North Korean authorities can be completed on time.  How I envy him!

I am going to take back some of the praise I lavished on Chinese railways last week.  That was after riding "soft sleeper" class from Beijing to Changchun.  Alas, "soft sleeper" is only available on the big inter-city routes.  For the 15-hour overnight local train from Changchun to Baihe we rode "hard sleeper", in a train indistinguishable from those I recall from the early eighties.  A "hard sleeper" carriage is divided by nine walls, which go about two thirds of the way across the width of the carriage.  This makes ten compartments open to a common corridor.  Each compartment has six beds, three on each side, designated "upper", "middle" and "lower".  Everything is grimy and beaten-up, and the lie-zhangs (carriage supervisors) are the old sour-faced crew I remember so well.  My spoiled American brats, after one look at the carriage's toilet, declared there was no way! they were going to use it — a refusal eventually over-ridden by Ma Nature, of course.  There is no air conditioning and no non-smoking section, though in practice most Chinese smokers are considerate if approached.  At night the lie-zhang shuts all the windows to keep out bugs.  There are, of course, compensations for all the grime, noise and discomfort.  For me, the opportunity to mingle with ordinary travellers and hear about their lives.  For the kids, the jungle-gym aspect of getting up to and down from the top bunks -- seven feet from the floor -- via the metal ladders provided.  And for Rosie?  A grimace and a shake of the head:  "Some things never change."

As well as the local Korean-Chinese of eastern Manchuria, there are many South Korean tourists, and you are as likely to hear Korean as Chinese on the slopes of Chang Bai Shan.  ("They think it's their damn mountain," muttered our cop-chauffeur in disgust.)  There are some hot springs below the waterfall, and a local Korean has built a fine bath-house where one can enjoy the mineral waters.  Afterwards, back in Baihe, we went to a local Korean restaurant, where the menu included several dog meat dishes.  I urged the kids to try it, but they would not, thinking of our treasured terrier mutt Boris back at home.  We had venison instead, served by two of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen.  Extrapolating from this in my coarse-minded way, and having noticed that the place contained rather a large number of curtained private rooms, I suggested to Rosie that the place was in fact a whore-house for South Korean business types.  We later found out that this is very far from being the case.  The restaurant is owned by a Korean-Chinese who also owns the nearby "Swimming Pool Hotel" — a delightful family place with water slides and so on, and clean spacious rooms.  The restaurant is also a family establishment, and I am deeply sorry for my base thoughts.  The owner in fact escorted us round with great courtesy, gave the kids bathing suits so they could play in his pools, and fed us again in the restaurant at a discount (our cop was not with us at this point).  The beauty of the girls is, apparently, only incidental.  Good luck to this gentleman — I have forgotten his name — building up his business in this remote place, in a very tough entrepreneurial environment.  If capitalism had heroes, he would be one.

Here is a pretty Manchu legend about Heaven Pool.  There was once a fairy, who was very beautiful but unfortunately barren.  The thought of her infertility caused her to weep; and eventually she had wept so much she had filled Heaven Pool with her tears.  At this point the King of Heaven took pity on her.  His name is Manjushri, a Buddhist deity.  (Or at any rate, Lamaist — the Manchus got their religion from Tibet via the Mongols ... though, like those other peoples, they fortified that gentle faith with infusions of their own aboriginal shamanism and animism.)  He caused the fairy to give birth to a beautiful boy child, whom she named Aixin Guoruo, which means "Golden One" in the local language.  This child became the ancestor of a race, whose people, in gratitude to Manjushri, named themselves "Manchu", and founded a dynasty that eventually conquered all of China.
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Changchun, Jilin Province: July 15th to 17th
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I feel as though I am the only person in China that is not thrilled by the acceptance of Beijing's bid to host the Summer 2008 Olympic Games.  Everyone here is jubilant.  That, given the fierce nationalism of the Chinese, and their aching desire to be a normal country like any other, is understandable.  Yet it is sickening to see the play the communists are making with this.  There is no doubt they regard it as a stamp of legitimacy on their horrible, cruel and corrupt regime.  Even worse is that few people here seem to notice this aspect of the matter.  Arriving back in Changchun yesterday after a trip to the Korean border, as we entered my brother-in-law's apartment the TV was tuned to a gaudy stage spectacular titled "Salute the Red Flag", with more of those emetic songs praising the Party and identifying it with the nation, that I have written of before.  With a dozen or more channels to choose from, this was apparently their viewing of choice.  There was a strong "welcome the Olympics" theme — the wretched thing must have been in preparation for months.  It is as obvious as anything can possibly be that the most pressing task for the Chinese people at this point in their history is to get rid of the communist party and acquire a rational, constitutional form of government.  Even just from the point of view of economics, there are zero historical instances of full advance into a modern economy under one-party dictatorial rule.  It has never happened, and it is not going to happen here.  Yet the Chinese people seem to have their minds fixed on the bread and (Olympic) circuses their rulers arrange for them, and to be not at all inclined to do what ought to be done.

That is to some degree an unfair judgment of course.  They will say, if you ask them: "What do you expect?  Conditions are not bad, and are still improving.  I have a life to live, and I just don't want to live it in a dungeon.  Would you?"  Chinese people, from millennial experience, think of politics as being something like the weather — you just have to put up with it and make the best of it.  There is nothing you can do.  The fate of the 1989 student movement confirms this, in their minds, though one could equally well argue that it proves the opposite.  The Party is not loved, by anyone I have asked about it, but they have delivered some modest progress and prosperity, stand up for the nation against foreign ill-wishers, and pretty much any TV channel is showing some Party-patriotic extravaganza in prime time, or else a two-hour report on the production of hog bristles in Shanxi Province.  I understand, I understand.  Still, I wish I had not found my sister-in-law watching that dreadful program.
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You have no doubt been asking yourself how your intrepid correspondent files his copy to NRO from remote parts of China.  The answer is wang-ba.  Wang means "net" and ba means "bar" (one of the very few loan-words in Mandarin).  A wang-ba is an internet cafe.  They are all over the place in China — there must be dozens in Changchun.  At any rate, when I enquired for the nearest one in this very ordinary residential neighborhood, it turned out to be just round the corner.  You walk in, pay a tiny sum of money — about one U.S. quarter for an hour — and surf the web.  Nothing seems to be blocked, though I confess I have done no systematic checking.  Certainly NRO is not blocked.  Before leaving New York I was apprehensive that I might not be able to find a wang-ba, having heard that the government was cracking down on them, had in fact closed 8,000 of them so far this year.  I supposed, when I read this, that the crackdown was political — a way of keeping people in the dark about what's going on in the rest of the world.  No doubt this is something to do with it;  but having now frequented three or four of these places, I feel sure that the main motive is social, not political.  The wang-ba is low life.  The computers are stripped-down, beaten-up and grimy.  You sit jammed in an unlit back room with a dozen other tube jockeys, practically all young men of the kind your parents (if you were Chinese) would warn you not to associate with.  They have long hair, sometimes dyed surprising colors.  They are round-shouldered and sunken-chested.  They wear T-shirts bearing legends in English that do not quite make sense yet manage none the less to be mildly suggestive (SING PRECOCIOUS GIRLS).  The air is thick with cigarette smoke.  Pop music of the maximum-parental-disapproval variety (which in north China means Cantonese pop from Hong Kong) is being played much too loud through poor speakers.  The youths — definitely "youths", not "young people" — converse in slang and croon hoarsely along with the music.  Slutty-looking girls wearing make-up and short skirts occasionally drift in.  A wang-ba is, in short, the Chinese equivalent of a pool parlor.  The whole institution labors under the further disadvantage that its name is almost a sound-pun for wang-ba-dan, a common Chinese curse, roughly equivalent to "s.o.b."  No wonder there are campaigns against the wang-ba.  May they never succeed.  One of the minor dangers facing China is that it will degenerate into a big Singapore — drilled, hygienic, and boring as all hell.  Let's hear it for low life.  Support your local wang-ba!
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I have always nursed some skepticism towards the idea that travel broadens the mind, having grown up with a man — my father — who was both well-traveled and narrow-minded.  There is no doubt, however, that if you have plenty of friends and relatives in the places you travel to, travel is a great corrective to the idea, rather common among journalists, that the only things that happen are the ones reported in the newspaper headlines.  Alastair Cooke had a story I like about being in New York during WW2 while London was enduring the Blitz.  After several days of reading headlines screaming LONDON IN FLAMES!  Cooke managed to get a phone call through to his friends in London.  "George, George, are you all right?" he yelled down the phone.  George:  "Well, my rheumatism's been acting up a bit..."  So with China today.  Falun Gong?  WTO accession?  The Hainan plane incident?  Sure, you can get a conversation going on these topics (see below) but they do not loom very large in the minds of most people.  Of much more pressing concern are getting the kid through her latest round of exams, recent developments in a long-running plan to get a better apartment, and whether Tianjin can shut out Sichuan in the soccer playoffs.  Except at once-in-a-century moments of acute national peril, this is what life is like for most people.  For journalists, who make their livings from the headline stuff, it is salutary to be reminded of this simple fact.  Yes, I am on vacation.
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Fifth Uncle has joined the Party.  This emerged at a family banquet the other night.  Everyone congratulated him.  The whole thing had me baffled, I must admit.  Fifth Uncle is the Uncle Vinnie of the family.  In his late forties, he works installing heating boilers in buildings for a state-owned enterprise.  He is broad and heavy in a slightly intimidating way, is always well turned-out, with designer glasses and hair en brosse, is exceptionally worldly, something of a fixer in fact, and is a devoted family man, with a wife who never seems to speak.  In New York he'd be wearing pinkie rings.  Why did he join the Party?  I asked him straight out, but got only boilerplate in reply:  "So I can make a better contribution to the modernization and opening of our country..." yada yada.  I made further inquiries among family members.  The bottom line is, his company offered it to him as an incentive, the way American companies give you a title (VP, Director) when they don't want to pay you more money.  Is there anything in it for him?  Well, being a Party member will get you some connections.  It's like joining the Freemasons — helps smooth one's path through life.  Also like the Masons, it comes with a tariff of time and money — in the case of the latter, five per cent of your income.  Perhaps that is how the Party will end at last:  as an arcane, slightly comical secret society for middle-aged men.
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Education is, as everyone knows, taken very seriously in China.  Two of the grandest and — to judge from externals — best-constructed new buildings in the neighborhood are the middle school my nephew attends and the corresponding high school.  At the latter, college entrance examinations were being held this last week.  This has caused great inconvenience for everybody because the mothers of the examinees, in order to minimize noise, have closed down the street in front of the school, erecting barricades at each end.  It's a major road, and everyone has to detour through crowded and ill-paved back streets.  No-one dares defy the mothers though.  I saw one minibus driver try, edging past one of the barricades when the mothers were distracted elsewhere.  They soon spotted him though, and converged on him like antibodies on a bacterium.  I thought I was going to witness another Reginald Denny incident.  "Can't the authorities act to keep the road open?"  I asked a cousin.  He laughed.  "They wouldn't dare."
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Someone called me "Comrade" the other day.  It was a half-crazy old beggar-woman on the streets of a small town in eastern Manchuria, a very out-of-the-way place, but it jolted me none the less.  In two weeks back in China this was the first time I have been called "Comrade" — the universal form of address twenty years ago.  I have the impression that this whole area of the Chinese language is in a state of flux, and that Chinese people are not quite sure how to address each other when they meet as strangers.  The loose rule seems to be:  anyone in a service job is called fuwuyuan ("serviceperson");  anyone with a claim to having trained extensively for his job is a shifu ("master"); any youngish woman is a xiaojie ("Miss");  anyone else defaults to "Mr" or "Mrs".  I find that I am generally addressed by strangers as "Mr", being a foreigner apparently perceived as requiring no special training.  Similar uncertainties occur all over the modern world, I think.  I have noticed that my children's playmates do not know how to address me.  Occasionally they call me "John", which I dislike hearing very much from 8-year-olds.  None of their parents seem to have taught them that "Mr Derbyshire" is the correct form.  Why not?
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At the banquet where he announced his Party membership, Fifth Uncle passed some disparaging remarks about the Falun Gong sect, against whom the Party is waging all-out war.  This stirred Rosie to protest.  She has a dear friend in New York who is an ardent FLG disciple.  He has lent her their "Bible" and some video tapes that teach FLG meditation techniques.  A spirited conversation broke out around the table (there were a dozen or so adults present: it was a private room).  Only Fifth Uncle and Rosie's father -- a Party member since 1956 -- took the official line.  Most of the others were more or less sympathetic, though no-one seems to be a practitioner.  Sample remarks: 

  • Ten thousand of them assembled in Tiananmen Square that time.  Yet when they left, there wasn't a scrap of litter left behind!
  • The Party, with all its prestige and propaganda, has 80 million members.  FLG, in spite of all the persecution, has 100 million.  What does that tell you about the appeal of their beliefs?
  • [This one from a person who had read the FLG "Bible" himself]:  The main principles they teach are truth, kindness and forbearance.  Yet the government says they are "leading people astray".  How can they be "leading people astray" by teaching truth, kindness and forbearance?

Where their nationalist passions are not engaged, the Chinese people can see through their goverment's propaganda with no difficulty. 
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I have an odd, not-much-shared fascination with onomastic fashions.  My own kids' names were chosen in a conventional way, from the histories of my family and my country, and from the Bible.  Their elementary-school classmates, however, are mainly Kyles and Dylans, Ashleys and Brittanys, names which (snobbery alert here) seem to me as rootless and ephemeral as if they had been plucked from among the brand names on the shampoo shelves of my local supermarket.  I have not much explored the meanings of current Chinese given names, beyond a vague feeling that they are more whimsical than those of older generations, but there is definitely a fashion here recently for one-syllable given names.  If you are Chinese you have a family name, almost invariably one-syllable (the only exception you are likely to encounter is "Ouyang"), and a given name that may be either one syllable or two.  The family name is placed first, so that a person whose name is Liang Weilin has family name "Liang" and given name "Weilin".  If a person has a two-syllable given name like this, you use it to address him informally:  "Hey, Weilin!"  When a person has a one-syllable given name, however -- as it might be, Liang Yu -- you hail him by the entire name:  "Hey, Liang Yu!"  Well, the fashion for one-syllable given names is now running so strong that people are dropping syllables.  My twin cousins, full names Liu Jinfang and Liu Yaofang, have let it be known that they wish to be addressed as "Liu Jin" and "Liu Yao".  I am still trying to come up with a sociological explanation for this.  All that my Chinese acquaintances can tell me is:  "It just sounds cool."
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The Derbs are suffering from withdrawal symptoms.  Tuesday morning we left the Northeast and flew to Xi'an.  Practically the whole of Rosie's extended family — five full car-loads — turned up at the airport to see us off.  There were many tears, and I admit I was close to choking up myself.  We miss them terribly.

I have mixed feelings about Chinese hospitality.  The first Chinese family I was ever the guest of lived in an old-style courtyard house behind a wall in Taipei City, Taiwan.  A taxi deposited me at a door in the wall one hot July afternoon.  I rang the bell.  In due course the door was opened by a small, bent, oldish man wearing faded pajamas and plastic house slippers.  Greeting me effusively in Chinese (of which at that point I could not understand a word), he tried to grab my two large suitcases.  I assumed he was some sort of family retainer, a butler perhaps, as I knew the family was well off.  Still, butler or not, chivalry forbade me letting this feeble old party totter off with my bags.  He might have had a heart attack.  So there commenced one of those Chinese courtesy fights:  "Let me do it!  It's my responsibility!" — "No, no, it's mine!  I insist!"  ... which would probably still be going on today if the young son of the family had not turned up and taken my bags.  I then learned that the pajamaed old "butler" was in fact the patriarch of the family, a learned man of high standing in Taiwan, with a long and distinguished career in public service — the equivalent of a senior federal judge.

This kind of thing is charming at first, but soon becomes irksome.  You weary of being fussed over, and smiled at, and paid for.  You do not want to engage in yet another banal conversation about food, travel or local customs.  You tire of the endless ritual arguments over who's going to pay the bill, and begin to yearn for the frank simplicities of the West.  ("Do you want to get this one, or shall I?" — "I'll get it.  You get the next one.")  You start to feel the way pre-modern travelers in China felt:  that all the elaborate courtesy is a cloak for deceit and insincerity and what economists call "rent-seeking" — that is, they hope to get something out of you.  You become boorish, suspicious and contrary, and succumb to that ailment that anyone who has lived in this country for more than a few months knows very well, usually at first hand:  China fatigue.  Not infrequently, it all ends in violence.

I know all about that.  I have been through it all, and out the other side.  This last few days with my wife's family in Manchuria were nothing like that.  The courtesies were sincere, the warmth genuine.  A cousin who is a busy professional man spent most of a day getting me a visa extension at the local police station.  An uncle arranged train tickets for us — an arduous process in China — and persuaded a friend of his in the far east of the province to chauffeur us round for the day on a visit to see the sights of that district.  My brother-in-law took the kids to the local zoo and amusement park, spending (we later computed) about half his month's salary on them.  This, after taking his own wife and son off to his father's two-bedroom apartment, in a district of the city where water was rationed, so that we could have free use of theirs, which was in an unrationed part of town.  When my wife mentioned that I like to eat a banana with my breakfast, suddenly all my relatives' apartments filled up with bananas, and I was having bananas thrust on me every time I went calling.  I declared a fondness for kidney:  every meal thereafter included a dish of kidney, cooked in many different and imaginative ways.  Cars and drivers were commandeered from people's work units whenever we wanted to go anywhere.  (None of my Chinese relatives owns a car, though one has a driver's license.)

We were not allowed to pay for anything, other than those items — train and plane tickets, forward hotel bookings, visa fees — that were obviously our responsibility.  The cousin who got us our plane tickets to Xi'an also ran some other errands on our behalf, all involving fees and expenses he paid for out of his own pocket.  Adding it all up before we left, and converting at a rate I knew he could get, I calculated that we owed him US$561.  Not wishing to seem stingy, and figuring that his time and trouble were worth something, I slipped six bills into his shirt pocket and thanked him at an appropriate point during our last evening's banquet.  In an arrived-safely call to Rosie's Dad our first evening in Xi'an, we learned that our cousin had done the same calculation I had done, come to precisely the same result, subtracted it from six hundred, and already given the balance to Dad, to be forwarded to us ASAP.  That's my family:  proud, honest people.

Whose lives are not always easy — are, in fact, sometimes very hard.  Fourth Uncle, who fed us a sumptuous meal the night of our arrival in Changchun, worked for a unit that recently went bankrupt.  His wife worked for the same unit.  (Because the "work unit" is still the center of life for most Chinese people, and because they do not socialize much outside the family, most Chinese people marry someone from their own unit.  If the unit goes bust, both breadwinners are out of work.)  Fourth Uncle and his wife currently scrape along on unemployment pay, a flat US$28 a month each, together with help from other family members.  Life is not secure or prosperous for any of my family here.  yet these people pulled out all the stops for us, slew the fatted calf for us, eagerly and joyfully, from simple family feeling and the pleasure of greeting a long-absent sister.  Banquets were laid on every night.  The kids were spoiled disgracefully.  We were spoiled disgracefully.

Monday night, the night before we left, I threw a return banquet for them all, and took the opportunity to make a little speech in my clunky Mandarin, thanking them for their innumerable kindnesses and expressing my heartfelt gratitude for the good fortune to have acquired such a warm, close and generous family.  At the time I married Rosie, fifteen years ago, my father-in-law — who had bitterly opposed the marriage until the last minute — had taken me by the hand and said:  Women shi yi jia ren — "We are one family."  I reminded the company of that and affirmed that we are, indeed, one family.

The Chinese family has not always had a good press.  Young Chinese intellectuals in the early years of the twentieth century felt that the traditional "big family" system, in which three or four generations lived together in a sprawling old-style house — "breeding like oysters", as Orwell said of the Victorian British — was a bar to the nation's progress and an oppression of the human spirit.  This sentiment found literary expression in Ba Jin's late-1920s novel Jia — "The Family", still worth reading today in this context (there are at least two English translations).  Mao Tse-tung, who did not get on with his own family, did his best to wreck the institution.  Well, I understand all that, too.  Yes:  the old ideals of filial piety and family solidarity covered up a multitude of sins.  I also appreciate Francis Fukuyama's point, that a society whose "radius of trust" does not extend far beyond the blood family is not well equipped to develop consensual politics or rational economics.  I might even admit, at the point of a sword, that the attentions of my family this past few days were occasionally stifling.  And even darker things:  "anti-foreignism" — to be blunt, loathing and envy of the white race — are never far beneath the surface in China, and from this point of view I may be just a foreign Jew married into a family of Weimar Germans.  Yes, yes, I know all this.  But "speak as you find", as we say in Northamptonshire, here is how I feel about my Chinese family:  I adore them.  I long to see them all again.  Should any of them turn up at my door in Long Island, I shall attend to their comfort and convenience with the same indefatigable zeal they have brought to mine.  "We are one family," and I am thankful for it.

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